One of my sweet friends, Tracy Hales, posted this meme on her Facebook wall today. Needless to say, it could not have come at a move perfect time.
As a part-time Campus Pastor, full-time mom of two, and a full time wife, at times I feel like my ministry opportunities are not as well versed as they used to me. This past weekend a few of my very good friends hoped on different planes to Haiti to go minister and serve. [Envious does not shine enough light on the emotions I was feeling]. I wanted to go, but having a four month old at home and a job that keeps me extremely busy this time of year, would not allow for me to travel. Not to mention all the typical household chores and projects that need to be done. I have spent my time praying for Luke 101 and the team traveling with them expecting God to do great things through their ministry efforts, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t struggling with not being on Haitian soil with them.
Yesterday, as I was driving to my in-laws, my conversation with God was interrupted by my three year old son, Z. At the first initial question, I was slightly annoyed, because I sharing my heart with the Lord about my disappointment and discouragement of not being in Haiti and feeling like I was failing in areas of ministry. As my son began to speak, God revealed some important truths to me.
Z asked me, “Momma, why did Adam and Eve disobey God?” [To be honest, my mind was disheveled by his, rather, large question]. I grabbed the rearview mirror, pulling it down, so I could look at him as I spoke… “Son, satan tricked her into thinking God did not care about her. He made her think God was keeping her from doing something that would make her better and smarter.” (Can I just say that trying to talk serious topic with my son concerning the Bible is extremely intimidating). As I watched his little three year old mind work by the inquisitive look on his face I knew he was really trying to process what I was saying. A few minutes later, he said, “Momma?” “Yes, son.” I replied. “Was Eve just being selfish?” he asked. “Yeah, I suppose she was. She wasn’t thinking about the affect of her actions on herself or other people,” I said. Then Z said, “God told her not to eat that fruit; that apple. She did it any way though. That was not very smart!”
I took that moment to explain to my sweet curious boy that we ALL have sinned and fall short of God’s love, but that is why we need Jesus. I explained it ore simple terms how we are “not very smart” on even our best days. I asked him if Daddy and I ever ask him to do something and he disobeys us? He quickly responded with, “When you told me not to jump on the couch and I did it any way? Then I hit my head.” “Yes, exactly like that! I wasn’t telling you that to keep you from having fun, but because I knew the dangers that come from jumping on the couch. You could have gotten hurt, and you did. It is the same way with God and Eve. God knew what was on that tree could hurt her, and she disobeyed him anyway,” I said. He quickly interrupted exclaimed, “Then she got hurt forever.” Ha! Yeap!
As I continued driving, I watched him mull over those words and his little big thoughts. God reminded me right then that even though I am not in Haiti doing ministry… MY MINISTRY IS HERE! My boys are my ministry and through them I will leave my legacy. I have an opportunity to leave a lasting impression on this world through the men of character and integrity they become. Through our discussions about the Bible and our Creator, I may possibly assist my sons in sharing the Gospel of Jesus Christ to their classmates, friends, teammates, and their precious children.
I felt color filling my pale fall face and tears swelling in my eyes as the Lord brought me back to reality and gave me a lesson in humility. I am doing ministry… every single day! I do ministry from the time my children wake up until they go to bed. From tiny life lessons about seasons changing, those tender prayers he prays every night for the same couple for almost a year and God answers in a HUGE way, from moments where I want to pull my hair out when my [three]nager thinks he knows more than me and tap dances on my last nerve, those precious thirty minutes he climbs in bed to cuddle with me before we start our day, the interrupted bath or potty breaks, the sweet glimpses of his gentleness and love for his brother, or even those billions of “why” questions that sometimes get exhausting… those are teachable moments… ministry moments! From how I reaction, from the words I speak [LIFE or death], from how I communicate my emotions, or even the looks I give… they are all moments for me to minister to my children.
I pray multiple times a day, asking God not to let me screw my children up. Asking for opportunities to share Jesus with my boys and teach them how to be honest, kind, and respectable young men. I am teaching them what to look for in a future wife (by how I treat their dad) and a future mother to their children (by how I treat them). I have my work cut out for me and my focus is needed right where it is. My ministry is here! For now, every minute of every day, this is my ministry and I am working hard on leaving a legacy. I will {BLOOM} where God has planted me. I will take it seriously and realize it’s importance.